AR Auto Service

Originally posted May 7, 2008

This is the *second* race of the season and I have a trump card for this race!

Side note : John Hudak’s NSX went down before the weekend even started with some internal engine damage. Cause is still unknown but regardless of what it is it will be expensive. The Crazy widebody NSX will be out of commission for a while now.

First, let me tell you about the secret mods unknown to my competitors that have begun to take place in the dark of the night.

They are as follows:

1)Contact Lenses. Yes. I have been racing without being able to actually see the race track.

2)Ride height. Apparently the previous owner of the car had installed a new set of shocks without pre-loading the control arms. The car is sitting about 1″ higher than it should be.

3)Wheel bearings. In the last March race I almost lost a wheel off of my car at the end of the race due to a failed bearing. Being the crazy anal retentive guy that I am, I had all 4 bearings and hubs replaced.

Now, let me tell you about the Eddie driving style. There are several key points that make the Eddie driving style unique.

1)Brake late and brake hard. Ok. Let me rephrase that. Brake too late and brake too hard.

2)Chuck the car into the corner for all its worth. Tire wear be damned.

3)Use every inch of the track. And maybe a bit extra as well.

The above style was good for a 1:35.1 second lap time in the previous race but just wasnt working well due to the fact that the Integra has no brakes and the tires are really expensive.

The previous course record for SSB class at Portland International Raceway is a blistering 1:33.9. The track is in fact longer than before, but faster in some sections making the lap times difficult to compare. Some of the classes have broken the old course record but most of them are slower, making me think that the 1:35.1 second lap time is in the ballpark of where I should be.

Unfortunately, my huge elephant sized ego wont let me leave it at that. I must break the old course record regardless of whether the course is slower or not. The problem? The 1:35.1 lap time was set during qualifying and I was driving the old Eddie style for all it was worth.

So, for this weekends race I change gears a little bit and focus on braking less (since I dont have brakes) and attempting to use the throttle more (scratch Eddie driving characteristic #1). My tire manufacturer tells me that radial slicks develop grip when they are loaded gradually and can’t be chucked into the corner. (Scratch Eddie driving characteristic #2). My car tells me that running over the curbing is taking its toll on shocks and bushings and might end up very expensive. (scratch Eddie driving characteristic #3)

After re-inventing the driver (Eddie) and molding myself into something completely different than before, I whip out a course record demolishing 1:33.3 lap time. And, since there were no competitors in my class again I simultaneously take first place and last place.

At this rate I will be the undefeated and undisputed Oregon Region SSB class champion.